Sunday, March 13, 2011
Finally... it has been a week plus since my last post. Sorry guys, but school work's really taking up lots of my time :( Anyway, I've put up this song quite some time back. I remember putting up this song at that time cause I love the melody of the song. But now, I'm putting it up again cause I can truly feel the song.
Sacrificial Love, how apt. sigh...
Sacrificial Love
Sometimes I feel like
I'm chasing the shadows in your eyes
Losing my footing and looking for something
I recognize
You tell me you're here for forever
But act like you're passing through
Which one's the real you
Which one's the real you
Are you only
Practicing until you find the real thing
Taking up space
Until you find yourself that perfect face
Are you looking
Over my shoulder
Am I enough
Or just your sacrificial love
I know when we started
That I kind of talked you into this
I was good for the moment
But now something's missing
From your kiss
I see you lying beside me
But I feel you're moving on
Which one's the real you
Which one's the real you
Are you only
Practicing until you find the real thing
Taking up space
Until you find yourself that perfect face
Are you looking
Over my shoulder
Am I enough
Or just your sacrificial love
Do I have to spill my tears
Teach you how to say goodbye
If that's not what I am to you
Then what am I
What am I
Are you only
Practicing until you find the real thing
Taking up space
Until you find yourself that perfect face
Are you looking
Over my shoulder
Am I enough
Or just your sacrificial love---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yay, finally received my belated Valentine's gift on Wed :D
Thought I won't be receiving any Valentine's gift this year cause I kinda screwed up my Valentine's this year. But surprise surprise! I still got it in the end, even though it may be a few weeks after the actual day, but hey, such things are never too late :P
Hurhur, been quite drained emotionally this past few weeks. Not that I haven't felt it before, but the effect of it has been rather pronounced recently.
I've been fighting too hard for the affection which I deserve. Fought too much, gave too much... It's till the extent that I really think I'm quite pathetic, to the point where a little of affection makes me go over the moon for only a split second before I find myself fighting for it again. It's really like a starved refugee going gaga over a piece of tree bark which he ingests with euphoria when it's being given to him. Yeah, it's sad and pathetic. I have to do so many things, only to receive a tinge of affection, where the amount of it is seriously nowhere justified.
I'm really tired, but I still find myself doing it. Why? 'Cause I've been holding on to the belief that one day, all my efforts will pay off. But from the looks of it, there's still lots of work to be done.
I chose to exchange the band for this bear. I have to make myself believe that's it worth it, though current situations doesn't really show that that's the case.
"I'll treat you better next time k?"
That's what which is being told to me. I don't know how true that statement holds, cause seriously I've heard it for quite a couple of times, and it all seems like just empty say. But then again, I refuse to give up just like this. I'm exhausted, I don't deny. But I'm not till the stage of giving up yet, I won't let go until I become the primary figure, I WON'T REMAIN SECONDARY!!
I will change that WARPED, ERRONEOUS & IMMORAL MINDSET!!!
But up till now, I can only use my tears to wash away the fatigue and fear. Hope I have enough of them. Certainly hope that they won't be released in vain. *silent prayers*
|Shi Hao| 2:55 AM|
------
